Monday, October 29, 2007

Synonyms we regret

A car-ride conversation with my second-grader:

Second-grader: [In a tough voice] "Don't put the boot in my glute! [pause] Mom, what is a glute?"
Me: "Well, it's another word for butt-cheek."
SG: [Cracking up] "Butt-cheek?"
Me: "Um, yeah. It's short for gluteus maxiumus, which is Latin for butt."
SG: "So what's the dance word for glute?"
Me: "Booty."
SG: "Hip-hop?"
Me: [Giggling] "I think it's trunk."
SG: "Rock?"
Me: [Sighing] "Ohcomeonnow!"
SG: "What IS it?"
Me: "Well, it's, um, ass, but that's a grown-up word and you shouldn't use it!"
Preschooler: "Mom, what's an ASS?"
Me: "It's a butt, but don't use that word!"
SG: [Laughing loudly] "Okay mom, we won't say ASS! [Tough voice again] Don't put the boot in my glute! Don't put the boot in my glute! Ha ha! GLUTE! HAHA!"